


he's the air I would kill to breathe

by hwespn



Category: Glee
Genre: Boys In Love, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, I'm not good at tagging, Light Angst, M/M, Skank Kurt Hummel, alternative universe
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-19
Updated: 2018-01-16
Packaged: 2018-12-17 10:31:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,854
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11849724
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hwespn/pseuds/hwespn
Summary: There’s two sides to Kurt: the Skank version for school, and the actual version.





	1. chapter 1.

**Author's Note:**

> hello everyone! I've recently re-discovered my love for skank!kurt and decided to try my hand at writing my own skank!kurt fic! i didn't intend for this to be multi-chaptered, but apparently now that's where this is going! hope you all enjoy!
> 
> title is from the song "breathe again" by sara bareilles.

Kurt Hummel loves a lot of things. If you asked people at school, they’d say the things he loved were more along the lines of reckless fighting and meaningless sex and instilling fear. If you asked Kurt himself, his first answer after his father would be Blaine Anderson.  
  
There’s two sides to Kurt: the Skank version for school, and the actual version.  
  
It’s an armor – the dyed hair, pierced nose, dark clothing, smudged eyeliner, the icy attitude. It’s all an act he began sophomore year after things got so bad he just wanted an escape. He wanted to be anything but himself, so he became a skank. Befriended Quinn Fabray, put some colorful streaks in his hair, started skipping class and took up smoking. It kept away Dave Karofsky and Azimio Adams and other meatheads who used to pick on Kurt. Now Kurt can walk down the hallway and not fear being slammed into lockers or slushied because he’s a skank, and skanks don’t take anyone’s shit.  
  
And then during junior year, came Blaine Anderson. Blaine, with his gelled hair and bowties and colored cuffed jeans and boat shoes and affinity for breaking out into song and a love for Broadway musicals and sees the good in everyone. He transferred from Dalton Academy in Westerville after his parents got divorced and he moved with his mom to Lima.  
  
They met when Karofsky and Azimio decided to make Blaine their newest target and Blaine, as small and sweet as he is, refused to just stand there and take the taunting and instead fought back. Azimio and Karofsky were crowding Blaine in against a locker, and that’s when Kurt stepped in; that was over a year ago, the rest is history.  
  
And now they’re here, in Kurt’s bathroom. Kurt is sitting on the counter and the window is cracked open as he smokes a cigarette, blowing the smoke away from Blaine and toward the window as Blaine stands in the V of his legs, plastic gloves on as he works dye into his hair. His pink streaks were getting faded, so Blaine took the liberty of re-dyeing them into his own hands. Kurt flicks the last of the cigarette into the open toilet while Blaine takes off and discards the dirty gloves. Kurt hops off the counter and leans in to kiss Blaine, but Blaine scrunches his face and turns away so Kurt’s lips land on his cheek.  
  
“Right, sorry,” Kurt says, voice a tad rough from the cigarette. He turns toward the sink and washes his hands, and then brushes his teeth quickly before turning back to Blaine. Blaine initiates the kiss this time, leaning up and wrapping one hand around Kurt’s neck to pull him towards him and kissing him gently.  
  
“Much better,” Blaine grins, kissing him quick again before turning toward the now-empty box of hair dye. “This says to leave the color in for 20 minutes, so I’ll set the timer on my phone.” Blaine does as he says and then turns back to Kurt, who is leaning against the counter, eyes fixed on his boyfriend.  
  
“You would look really good with some color in your hair,” Kurt blurts, reaching out a hand and petting Blaine’s hair before running a thumb along his hairline. “Maybe blue, or green to match your eyes.”  
  
“Yeah, dyed hair would go so well with my polos and button-up shirts and suspenders,” Blaine says lightheartedly, rolling his eyes.  
  
“I think it would,” Kurt says softly, fondly. And then more playful, he adds, “It could give you a geeky punk look. It’d be kind of sexy.”  
  
Blaine rolls his eyes again and kisses Kurt. They kiss lazily for a few minutes, conscious of the hair dye in Kurt’s hair before they’re interrupted by Blaine’s phone timer going off. Blaine pulls away with a wet smack and then Kurt’s attempting to reel him back in, chasing his lips as Blaine leans away.  
  
“Nuh-uh,” Blaine chastises. “We have to wash out your hair first.”  
  
Blaine helps Kurt wash out his hair and goes to lay on his bed while Kurt dries and styles his hair. He falls back into the pillows, pulling the comforter up to his chin. He turns his head a little and inhales the scent of the pillow – cigarettes and Kurt’s jasmine-scented shampoo. After a little bit, Blaine begins to doze. The sound of Kurt’s humming and the light sound of a blow-dryer lulls him to sleep, and a few minutes later he feels Kurt slip in behind him, pulling him close and kissing his cheek.  
  
When he wakes up, it’s to Finn standing in the doorway.  
  
“Hey Finn,” Blaine says, voice groggy from sleep. “What’s up?”  
  
Finn hesitates before stepping into the room. “Have you talked to Kurt about coming back to Glee?”  
  
Regionals is coming up, and the glee club is one member short. Blaine doesn’t want to push Kurt to join again, he knows Kurt doesn’t want to fall back into the habitual slushie-facial and locker slams and constant taunting. It’s scary for Kurt to go back to Glee because he knows they’ll all see under his fake exterior into who he really is – into who he _still_ is. And that might break Kurt’s faux-hardness, might send him spiraling into who he used to be and then he’ll be back where he started.  
  
“It hasn’t come up,” Blaine shrugs, and Kurt grumbles behind him, burying his face into the crook of Blaine’s neck.  
  
“Go away, Finn,” Kurt groans, wrapping an arm around Blaine’s waist and pulls him closer.  
  
Blaine shrugs again, and Finn sends him one last look before turning and leaving, shutting the door a little behind him.  
  
“Come on, Kurt, we should get up. I have to get home.” Blaine squirms a little, and Kurt just holds him tighter.  


“A few more minutes, baby,” Kurt sighs, leaving kisses on Blaine’s neck. Blaine almost lets himself fall asleep again, but then he feels pressure on his neck and Kurt’s chuckling.  
  
“Did you just bite me!?” Blaine asks, doing his best to sound scandalized.  
  
“I hope you have a scarf or something to wear tomorrow,” Kurt says, kissing the same spot he just bit over and over and Blaine isn’t facing him but he can feel his smirk.  
  
“Kurt!” Blaine laughs and fights his way out of Kurt’s grip, getting pulled back by his hips into the bed but swatting Kurt’s hands away and running into the bathroom. On his neck is a red mark, already bruising. Blaine runs his fingers over the mark, feeling the indents of Kurt’s teeth and rolling his eyes.  
  
“If my mom sees this she’s going to hunt you down,” Blaine leans against the bathroom doorframe. “She doesn’t even know I have a boyfriend.”  
  
“She’d have a heart attack if she found out her son has a punk boyfriend corrupting his innocence,” Kurt says, sitting up in bed and leaning against the headboard. “So you better find a way to slip past her without her seeing that hickey.” And then, with a glance at the digital clock on his bedside table he adds, “C’mon, baby, I’ll walk you out.”  
  
Blaine’s heart flutters at the endearment as it always does when he gets to see the softer side of Kurt, a smile pulling on his lips as he grabs his bag. Kurt leads him down the stairs, a guiding hand on the small of his back. Blaine waves bye to Burt and Carole and Finn before Kurt walks him to his car.  
  
Blaine’s leaning against his car, looking up at Kurt through his lashes. “Why don’t you want me to tell my mom about us?” Blaine asks, grabbing one of Kurt’s hands and swinging it between them.  
  
Kurt hesitates before answering, and then he sighs. “I don’t want her to judge me and stop me from seeing you.” Kurt puts his free hand against Blaine’s cheek, Blaine leaning into the touch. “You’re the only thing keeping me sane in this town. Before you, I wasn’t happy. I was hiding behind the dyed hair and leather and piercings, and I still am, but I know that with you I can be myself. There’s no hiding with you because you know me and you love me even though you know all my flaws and ticks and I don’t know what I would do if you got taken away from me.”  
  
“That would never happen, I wouldn’t let it,” Blaine says fiercely.  
  
“I know, baby,” Kurt shrugs self-deprecatingly. “But my look doesn’t translate well to parents.”  
  
“Please,” Blaine turns on the puppy dog eyes and he _knows_ Kurt can’t resist. “For me? Just come over for dinner one day.”  
  
Kurt groans, “Fine. But if anything starts going south I’m out of there before she can ban me from seeing you.”  
  
Blaine rolls his eyes. “Stop being so dramatic and kiss me goodbye.”  
  
Kurt smirks, falling back into his flirty give-no-fucks persona. “Don’t have to tell me twice,” Kurt mumbles, placing his hand over the hickey on Blaine’s neck and leaning in, kissing Blaine hard. Blaine’s on his tip toes and he lets himself submit to Kurt, practically melting as he lets everything fall away around him and loses himself in Kurt’s lips and soft hands on his skin.  
  
“I love you, I’ll see you tomorrow,” Blaine says when he pulls away, kissing Kurt one last time before getting into his car.  
  
“I love you more, baby.” Kurt grins and waves goodbye to Blaine, going back into the house when Blaine drives away. 

* * *

  
  
The next morning at school, Kurt greets Blaine at his locker with a quick kiss and a dirty look to any onlookers. The hickey on Blaine’s neck is basically covered by his high-collared shirt, and some concealer fades the part peeking out.  
  
“How are you today?” Blaine asks, running his hand up and down Kurt’s arm.  
  
Kurt gets in these moods sometimes, where he just feels – hopeless. Like he’ll never get out of Lima or Ohio, and all the struggling and hiding is for nothing. He’s had a good past few days, but sometimes Blaine just doesn’t know. Especially when they’re at school, and Kurt is completely different. It makes getting a read on Kurt harder for Blaine.  
  
College acceptance letters are going to be mailed out soon, and Blaine knows how nerve-wracking that is for Kurt. Kurt’s kept his grades up throughout high school but he still gets scared that he won’t get into a school. Blaine tries to be there for him when Kurt feels down, so he doesn’t become voiceless and alone like he used to be.  
  
It frustrates Blaine sometimes, how things got so bad for Kurt that he had to become someone else in public. Blaine is a part of Glee and is friends with all the club members, but sometimes he remembers how no one stuck up for Kurt when he was being harassed and tormented and he just wants to yell in all their faces. Blaine’s seen Kurt behind the leather and eyeliner and snappy comments, seen him when he’s singing along to a Broadway playlist in the car or getting choked up at chick-flicks.  
  
He’s seen the bad – the anxiety that sometimes shakes Kurt to his core, the sadness that leaves him bundled in bed for hours or days at a time and makes the most mundane things seem like the hardest missions. But he’s also seen the good – Kurt’s laugh, uninhibited and loud, his singing, his sketches of designs he hopes to one day bring to life, heard his hopes and dreams. No one, besides Kurt’s dad, sees how he is behind closed doors. Not even Finn or Carole. And Blaine sometimes feels so lucky that Kurt chose him to share all these sides of himself with.  
  
“I’m okay,” Kurt says, and he means it. He’s feeling confident today, about his looks and his grades. He heard Finn yesterday talking to Blaine about glee, and he’s considering joining again. He really does miss singing, misses the drama better than any show in the Real Housewives franchise. It’s his senior year, after all, and this is the last time he’ll get the chance to be with the people he was once so close with. “I’m thinking about joining glee again.” These people know him better than anyone else and they might break down the exterior he spent so long building, but it’s a chance he’s willing to take. Hiding is getting exhausting.  
  
Blaine looks stunned for a moment but recovers quickly. “That’s great, Kurt! Why don’t you come to the meeting after school today? And then after we can go to my house?”  
  
Kurt raises an eyebrow, a smirk splitting his face in half. “Oh yeah? And what would going back to your house entail?”  
  
Blaine flutters his eyelashes, leaning in close and whispering, “A nice, hot,” and then he pulls away quickly, “dinner with my mom!” Blaine smiles brightly, kissing Kurt quickly before taking off down the hallway. “See you later, Kurt!”  
  
Kurt is taken by surprise but shakes it out, watching Blaine practically skip down the hallway to his first period class. He catches Karofsky staring at Blaine too, and then Karofsky’s eyes are on Kurt.  Kurt’s breath catches in his throat, _I’m not going to let you do to him what you did to me._  
  
Kurt snarls, and then Karofsky’s walking down the hall in the opposite direction of Blaine. He makes it through first and second period before he needs a smoke-break.  
  
He goes to the usual skank spot under the bleachers, plopping down on the ratty couch and pulling out a half-empty pack of cigarettes and a lighter from his bag. He’s worried now, about making a good impression on Blaine’s mom and about Karofsky’s eyes on Blaine and about if he’ll be welcomed back into glee.  
  
He's halfway through his second cigarette when he hears footsteps behind him. At first, he freezes, his natural instinct to expect the worst kicking in. But then the couch cushion next to him dips and he smells raspberries and cologne and he knows it’s Blaine next to him. Blaine leans his head on his shoulder, grounding Kurt and tethering his thoughts to the ground.  
  
It's enough for now.


	2. chapter 2.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kurt joins glee and meets Blaine's mom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is a tad short but !!!! more will be on their way. i don't know how many chapters this fic is going to have but thank you everyone for reading!

Kurt is standing outside the choir room, taking slow deep breaths as he works himself up to walking into the room. Blaine’s in there already, gave him an encouraging kiss before walking into the meeting. He can hear everyone warming up and it calms his nerves enough for him to walk into the room. Everyone’s singing falls flat, the room going silent.  
  
“Kurt!” Rachel says, clapping her hands together. “So nice of you to join us! Is this your official glee comeback?”  
  
Kurt hesitates, glancing at Blaine. Blaine nods, and Kurt turns back to Rachel.  
  
“Yeah. I’m back in.” Kurt smiles – genuinely smiles – and then the club cheers, crowding around him and congratulating him. Mr. Schuester pats him on the back, telling him, “welcome back, buddy.”  
  
And then Kurt’s back in the swing of things, Mike and Brittany teaching him dance moves before he starts on the vocal part. Quinn joined glee again at the end of her junior year, a few months after Kurt had become a skank.  
  
It’s nice to be back but there’s still a part of him that can’t help but be a little apprehensive.  Joining glee again, it’s like getting a part of his old self back. But being his old self is what got him taunted and harassed.  
  
He pushes all his bad thoughts out of his head and focuses on the music.  
  
An hour later, he and Blaine are on their way out. They’re walking down the hall, Kurt’s arm around Blaine’s shoulder when there’s a chuckle from behind them.  
  
“Look, Z, it’s Skank Hummel and his butt-boy on their way back from Gay Club,” comes a voice – Karofsky – from behind them.  
  
Kurt and Blaine pause, and turn around.  
  
“Can we help you two? Are you lost?” Kurt snaps, removing his arm from Blaine’s shoulder and folding his arms across his chest. “I know that having a fucking pea brain can make simple things like finding your way around difficult, but I figured since _both_ of you have pea brains you’d have thought to put your heads together. Guess not.”  
  
“Shut up, Hummel,” Azimio barks, and Kurt’s jaw tightens, stepping closer to the duo.  
  
“What are you gonna do, huh? Hit me?” Kurt snaps. “Do it.”  
  
Blaine grabs Kurt’s arm, his voice pleading. “Kurt, come on, let’s go. They’re not worth it.”  
  
“Yeah, Hummel, listen to your girlfriend. Get going,” Karofsky smirks.  
  
Kurt tenses and he’s about to retort, but then he hears Blaine’s voice behind him, small and insistent – “Please, Kurt.”  
  
Kurt takes one last look at them and rolls his eyes. “You two are nothing without those letterman jackets.”  
  
Kurt takes off down the hall with Blaine. Karofsky calls out, “And you think you’re something? You’re going nowhere, Hummel! Nowhere!”  
  
They make it out through the front doors and to Kurt’s car. Kurt leans his head against the steering wheel, breathing heavy as Blaine gently rubs a hand up and down his back.  
  
“It’s okay, honey,” Blaine murmurs. “You’re okay, I love you so much, I’m so proud of you.”  
  
After a few minutes, Kurt calms down. He lifts his head up, leaning over the middle console and kissing Blaine.  
  
“I’m sorry,” Kurt says.  
  
“You have nothing to be sorry about, babe. You’re so strong,” Blaine breathes, kissing Kurt softly.

“You deserve better—” Kurt begins to say, but Blaine cuts him off.  
  
“None of that,” Blaine shakes his head. “I hate that you can’t see yourself through my eyes. You are so, so special, Kurt, and you’re going to go so far. You’re going to make it to New York and you’re going to be amazing at whatever you choose to pursue.” He smiles softly and nudges Kurt, “Let’s go, my mom will be home in like an hour and I want to be able to fool around before she gets home.”  
  
Kurt chuckles, shaking his head. “When did you stop being Mr. Dapper Gentleman?”  
  
“Sometime between the first and second time you kissed me,” Blaine smirks, taking Kurt’s head in his hands and kissing him loudly before they buckle themselves in and make their way back to Blaine’s house.  
  
Forty-five minutes, another hickey, and a rapid cool-down session later, Kurt and Blaine are lounging on the couch watching Project Runway reruns, Kurt occasionally commenting on what he does and doesn’t like about a piece. Blaine’s laying half on top of Kurt, his head against his chest and paying more attention to the rise and fall of Kurt’s chest than the show. He barely registers the door opening and closing until Kurt freezes and he hears his mother call out his name.  
  
“Blaine, I’m home!”  
  
“Show time,” Blaine murmurs, leaning up and kissing Kurt’s cheek before getting up and greeting his mom with a kiss on the cheek. “Mama, this is Kurt. My boyfriend.”  
  
Kurt’s off the couch now, standing a few spaces behind Blaine. When Blaine steps out of the way, Kurt is met with the smiling face of Blaine’s mom.  
  
The shock on her face is evident, but she covers it quickly. “Are you the reason my boy has been smiling so much these past few months?”  
  
“I hope so,” Kurt flushes, a shy smile on his lips as he shakes his mom’s hand. “Thank you for having me over for dinner, Ms. Anderson.”  
  
“Call me Pam,” she says sweetly. “I’ll get started on dinner now, hope spaghetti’s okay!”  
  
Both boys agree and Pam breezes into the kitchen, clattering around as she gets the food ready.  
  
“See? Not that bad,” Blaine says.  
  
“I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop,” Kurt says bluntly, shrugging.  
  
The couple goes back to watching Project Runway, Kurt conscious of Pam nearby and not pulling Blaine as close as he usually would.  
  
Blaine realizes this and does his best to not let it bother him.  
  
(It doesn’t work.)  
  
During dinner, Kurt is fidgety. The conversation flows easily, from Kurt’s school to his family to his hobbies. Kurt relaxes once he realizes Pam isn’t going to kill him, and Pam even takes interest in his piercings and dyed hair.  
  
And then, Pam starts asking about their relationship.  
  
“So how long have you two been dating?” Pam asks, glancing at Kurt and then Blaine.  
  
Kurt pauses, eyes darting to Blaine.  
  
“10 months,” Blaine mumbles.  
  
“What was that, sweetie?” Pam asks kindly.  
  
“We’ve been dating 10 months. We’ve known each other for like, a year and a half, I think. Since I transferred last September,” Blaine flushes pink, keeping his eyes fixed on his food.  
  
“10 months?” The hurt in Pam’s voice is evident. “Why didn’t you tell me?”  
  
Blaine doesn’t answer, so Kurt steps in.  
  
“It’s my fault,” Kurt says. “I’m…not really what most parents want for their kids and I didn’t want you to stop me from seeing Blaine.”  
  
“Oh, honey,” Pam coos, reaching across the table and placing a hand over Kurt’s. “Don’t ever feel like that. So you have some piercings and your look is the toned down clothes of a Kiss member, but I can tell you really care for Blaine. And I’m not his father, I won’t judge you before I know you. You make my Blaine happy, so you get a good mark in my book.”  
  
After dinner – and an awkward sex talk from Blaine’s mom that Kurt and Blaine both blush and stammer their ways through – Kurt heads home. He hugs Pam goodbye and kisses Blaine against his car until his lips are sore.  
  
When he gets home, Kurt gets a text from Blaine.  
  
_From: Blaine_  
To: Kurt  
**I’m so proud of you.**  
  
Kurt falls asleep with a smile on his face and feeling like he can take on the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you all enjoyed! as usual, comments and kudos are appreciated -- they're what keep me going!!
> 
> twitter: drrncrss  
> tumblr: blainesdevon  
> instagram: victoriamione


	3. chapter 3.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> changes and arguments

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! Hope you all enjoy this chapter. It's a tad short but I just wanted to write more for this story. Sorry it's taken so long!!!

Kurt didn’t think this through.

The royal blue skinny jeans, black v-neck, black scarf with white skulls and white doc martens? _That_ is thought through as his outfits usually are. This ensemble is a long way from his usual black-on-black-on-black outfits. He retired his leather armor for today, and he’s starting to regret it.

He never anticipated the looks he’s getting as he walks down the hall, scowling even harder than usual as he makes his way to Blaine’s locker.

He does his best to ignore the stares, and especially ignores Karofsky’s lingering eyes on him. Kurt sees the look out of the corner of his eye and his blood goes cold as he keeps his head up and walks a little bit faster.

“Hey, baby,” Kurt smirks, leans against the locker adjacent to Blaine’s.

Blaine peaks from behind his open locker door, his smile widening even more once he takes in Kurt’s outfit.

“Kurt!” Blaine always sounds so damn excited when he sees Kurt as if it’s not a daily thing. “Your outfit!”

Kurt reflexively curls in on himself. “What’s wrong with it? Should I go change? I have a spare set in my car—“

Kurt goes to turn and make a run for his car but Blaine grabs his hand. “No, you look… amazing.” Blaine’s voice is a little breathy and he smiles, and Kurt can’t help but return it.

A book slips out of Blaine’s grip and Kurt, being the chivalrous boyfriend he is, bends down to get it.

Just as Karofsky’s walking by.

And he gets a hard slam against the bottom locker by Karofsky.

“Stop _presenting,_ faggot. No one wants to see your goods.” Karofsky sneers, and Azimio’s laugh bellows. The two high five and disappear into the crowd. Blaine’s bent down next to him in a second, cradling his head in his hands and asking him if he’s okay.

“I’m fine, baby, don’t worry,” Kurt’s voice is monotone, his words rehearsed.

Blaine helps him up, Kurt wincing as Blaine puts a hand on his back to support him.

“I’m _fine_ ,” Kurt hisses, and Blaine automatically takes his hands off of him.

“Okay, okay,” Blaine says, holding his hands up in defeat. “I’ll see you at glee later, alright?” Blaine hesitates before leaning in and placing a quick kiss on Kurt’s cheek, shutting his locker and heading off to his first period.

Kurt shrugs his bag onto his shoulder and makes his way to first period.

* * *

 

By second period, Kurt finds himself under the bleachers. Lounging on the ratty couch with a cigarette dangling between his lips, he thinks. He thinks about if he really wants to subject himself to this mistreatment again, if laying his weapons down is worth it. He’d get to sing on stage again, would be able to pull out his designer clothes again. But at the same time, he’d become a moving target — and he’d put Blaine even more on the radar.

He smokes his way through one, two, three cigarettes. The smoke curls out of his lips and disappears into the cool air and he wishes the nicotine was a remedy for his thoughts, wishes he didn’t have to hide himself so much to the point where he barely recognizes himself. Is he really show-stopping clothes and heeled boots and scarves, everything he used to be? Or Is he really this, with the dyed hair and piercings and dark clothing?

He’s lost so much of himself and he doesn’t know how to get it back.

Kurt’s dropping his third cigarette onto the pavement when he hears the steady tap of Blaine’s shoes on the concrete.

“Mike told me you weren’t in class,” Blaine says.  
  
“God, Blaine, can you just leave me alone for _one fucking second_ ?” Kurt snaps and he can’t help it, it just comes pouring out of him. It’s like he’s cracking and flooding everything around him. “Has it ever occured to you that I want to be alone? That I don’t want my needy fucking boyfriend following me like a lost puppy? I need space, Blaine, and that includes space from _you_ .”  
  
Blaine winces at the words, stumbling back for a second. Kurt’s words are venom and they sting him. Kurt’s brain seems to catch up with his mouth and he’s up from the couch in a second, going towards Blaine.  
  
“No,” Blaine’s voice is watered-down and his eyes are tear-filled. “You want space? Fine.” Blaine turns on his heel, walking away from the bleachers.  
  
Kurt skips the rest of the day and doesn’t show up at glee.

* * *

  
  
“Where’s Kurt?” are the first thing out of Rachel’s mouth when Blaine walks into glee.  
  
“I don’t know,” Blaine tries to sound unbothered. “He told me he wants space, so I’m giving him some.”  
  
“Dude, he said that?” Finn asks, “Just a few days ago I saw you two all cuddly and stuff in bed!”  
  
“Yeah, well, things change, apparently,” Blaine shrugs.

* * *

  
  
**To: Blaine** **  
** **From: Kurt**

 _I’m sorry_  
  
**To: Blaine** **  
****From: Kurt**  
  
_I don’t know what I’m doing anymore_  
  
**To: Blaine** **  
****From: Kurt**  
__  
I’m just really lost and I shouldn’t have taken any of that out on you I’m so sorry  
****  
To: Blaine  
From: Kurt  
__  
_Can we talk about this? I’ll drive you to school tomorrow._  
  
**To: Kurt**  
From: Blaine  
  
_Okay_.  
  
**To: Blaine**  
**From: Kurt**  
  
_I love you_  
  
**To: Kurt**  
**From: Blaine**  
  
_I love you too._  
  
Kurt throws his phone on his bed and sighs. He's such an idiot. None of this is Blaine's fault, but he just needed to make someone feel as bad as he does and now... he's hurt one of the people he loves most.   
  
He turns so his back is to the mirror and looks over his shoulder at his reflection. He lifts up the back of his shirt and there on his pale skin is a baseball-sized bruise from where the lock dug into him when Karofsky pushed him. He traces his fingers over it and winces, shaking his head as he lets his shirt fall back down.  
  
"I'm home!" His dad, Burt, yells up the stairs, the front door slamming closed a few moments later.  
  
Kurt patters down the stairs in his pajama pants and a plain t-shirt, eyes red-rimmed and his hair tamed down so it's flat against his head. He looks defeated. He feels it, too.

"Kurt? What's wrong?" Burt freezes mid-movement while he's dropping his work bag on the floor.   
  
"I want to start therapy," Kurt says bluntly. "I need to see someone. I'm tired of being scared."  
  
Kurt watches his dad's face fall and he swears for a moment he'll say no, that he's fine and he needs to suck it up. Burt's standing in front of Kurt suddenly and he's about to take it back, say nevermind --   
  
"Okay, I'll see which ones are covered in your insurance," Burt's voice is soft, caring. He places a hand on Kurt's shoulder and looks him right in the eye. "I love you, son. I wish I were half the man you are." And then his dad's walking past him, making his way to the kitchen.   
  
Kurt chokes back tears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you loved it. As usual, comments and kudos are greatly appreciated <3
> 
> twitter: drrncrss  
> instagram: victoriamione  
> tumblr: blainesdevon OR psychegnosis

**Author's Note:**

> as always, comments and kudos are greatly appreciated. they're what keep me going!
> 
> twitter: drrncrss  
> tumblr: blainesdevon  
> instagram: victoriamione


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